grammys and trannys

So the grammys were recently handed out.
Personally, I feel that not a single award was given to a deserving recipient.
How in the world can mary j blige, that malformed tranny, ever win an award.
What she lacks in musical talent, she makes up for in biceps.
I have a feeling she did it with bono in order to get the award.
And when I say did it, I mean she did bono.
She boned bono.
I crack myself up.
Seriously, this blog’s purpose is to make its primary reader, aka ME, laugh.
If any of the secondary readers, ie the other 4 of you out there, find it funny, then good on you.

Anyways, heres my take on the grammys:

Album of the Year – Taking the Long Way (dixie chicks)

What utter rubbish.
the dixie chicks pander to only a tiny population of not even rednecks, but female rednecks.
How does this warrant an ‘album of the year’ award.

I bet only women with names like shania, mary-beth, mary-jo, jo-beth, mary-mary, etc heard this album.
Their only claim to fame was saying something against george bush. I respect them for that, but their music is utter country trash.

My choice – futuresexlovesound (justin timberlake)

Don’t be a hater.
JT explores several different styles of music, and comes up trumps with several of them.
Roping in TI was a master class.

Song of the Year – Not Ready to Make Nice (dixie chicks)

See above.
Also, check out the angsty title…
Not ready to make nice.
Why aren’t u girls ready?
Busy inter-breeding are we?

My choice – my love (justin timberlake)

Its one of those songs that just doesn’t get old on you.
My choices for these awards are obviously more mainstream than my usual musical tastes.

Hell if I really had my way, the award for ‘Song of the Year’ would go to both Tool for 'Vicarious', and Clipse for 'Trill'.

Best New Artist – Carrie Underwood

Who is this woman?
All I know of her is that every time I hear her name, I think of panties.
She cant be knew, I heard of her in 2005.
This is just wrong.
Best new artist should be…hmmm

This is a tough one.
There haven’t been any stunning new artists in 2006.
There’ve been a few notable ones though.
Ne-yo, lupe fiasco, the raconteurs, the fray.
I refuse to put gnarls barkley in here.
I have their album.
Nothing but hype.

My choice – Ne-yo

Once again, lets not be haters.
Personally, not my cup of black(yes I know what im saying).
But he had a few number ones and wrote songs for cassie and beyonce.
So he should get it.
Not underwearwoman.
Honourable mention – lily allen
Fashionista extraordinaire.
Shes got spunk, gotta give her that.

Best Rap Album – Release Therapy (Ludacris)

Ok.
If you know me, you’ll know im a big fan of luda.
But seriously, this album was miserable.
It was a sell-out album.
It didn’t have anything to redeem it.
It was just commercial bubblegum rap-pop.
Which makes it perfect for a grammy.

There were loadsa great rap albums in 2006.
Seriously.
The Game - Doctor's Advocate
Clipse - Hell Hath No Fury
Lupe Fiasco - Lupe Fiasco's Food & Liquor
Ghostface Killah - Fishscale
Busta Rhymes – Big Bang

But there was only one album which had me going hell yes.

My choice – King (T.I.)

i mean seriously.
TIP was brilliant on this one.
It didn’t just have songs, it had anthems.
No?
What do you call “what you know”?
Precisely.
So luda, you have a long way to go.
Stop selling out.
I swear.
If you collaborate with Britney or Mariah next, im gonna send oprah after you.
And we know nobody survives an oprah attack.

Best Rock Album – Stadium Arcadium (Red Hot Chilli Peppers)

Yesssssssssss.
Great.
Give them a grammy.
for their worst album ever.
Seriously.
There is like, 1 good song, on the 2 CDs.
That’s like paying for 40-plus songs and getting 1 good song.
Its like being sat on by a fatshionista.
Im sorry that is totally unrelated.
But seriously, some of you fatshionistas gotta lose some weight.
Or put on more clothes.
I digress.

This album really was terrible.
Keidis and the boys mustve run out of cocaine and pot when they made it.
On the other hand, there were a few decent rock albums released in 2006.
There were new albums from Tool, The Strokes, Foo Fighters, Audioslave, Killswitch Engage, etc.
There was the debacle that was ‘Sam’s Town’, by the Killers.
How amazingly overrated and bad are these blokes.
Ive heard bands in the local scene who can produce better music while being drunk.

My choice - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not (Arctic Monkeys)

These brit boys sure know how to rock.
And for once, they’re worth the hype.
Had me shouting “they say he changes when the sun goes down!” for quite a while.

Best R&B album – The Breakthrough (Mary J Blige)

Oh lord.
This woman is just nasty.
When she says breakthrough, she means the fact that she has finally been accepted by her fellow transvestites.
UGH.
Seriously.
She has no talent.
She must be sleeping with someone (male/female/other) to get this award.

Once, when I was a mere young tot, I went to the zoo.
With my hyper-developed observational skills, I watched the seals while they were fed.
They make this peculiar noise when beckoning for food.
Years later, I heard that very same peculiar noise, albeit with some background music, on the radio.
It was mary j blige.

There were other, better albums released.
Actually most of the RnB albums were crap.
I just refuse to give anything to mary j blige.
Uggh begone you behemoth.

My choice – Once Again (john legend)

Yes people. The fella can really sing, has decent grooves, and can play a mean piano.
I couldn’t think of any other rnb album worth mentioning.
Tough luck.

ok thats it for the grammys.
if you hate my choices, or are mary j blige(or her representatives) in disguise, begone.

in other news, the term break (what break?!) is ending.
School begins yet again.
And so the cycle continues.

lastly, I felt I had to highlight this.
The other day, I heard a cover of ‘slow motion’, one of my favourite songs by third eye blind.
The cover was by none other than the faggotty band known as panic at the disco.
Ugggh.

watch the 2 videos and be the judge of which version is better.
Note how the panic dude messes up the ending.
Kill.stab.disembowel.re-stab.

also note how when he says "i love you!", 8million 12-year old girls scream back...
yay!!
stick to covering the pussycat dolls,child.

all else is well.
gf is lovely and perfect as always.
much love to all those who matter.
im out.

heavens gonna burn your eyes

its a Saturday afternoon.
Most of the people I know are somewhere outside their homes, shopping, eating, or just chilling.

I, unfortunately, am stuck at home, overloaded with school work.

This semester I have FOUR projects.
Awesome.
Four times the fun!

So whats been up since I last updated?

lets see

There was the ASEAN cup
The boys and I went for most of the matches.
Oh fear not let me highlight a typically Singaporean tendency when it comes to supporting our national team

When our team is playing in the group stages,
The typical response to them is “oh they suck they wont do well theyre hopeless etc etc”

The number of people who chastised me for bothering to go down to the stadium and watch Singapore against Indonesia, a group stage match, was ridiculous.
My response was that if we don’t go and support our own national team, who will?

And then it began.
Singapore made it to the semis, against Malaysia
And there we had it.
The typical, pathetic fair-weather fan crawled out of his/her burrow, and in all his/her chest-thumping glory, proclaimed themselves ‘die-hard’ fans.
The hypocrisy is what puts me off.

There they were. Roughly 30,000 (im assuming there were at the most 20,000 real fans).
The cynics
The posers
Just there to take pictures, and to say to their friends
“yah I was there mah! Of course I love the team!”

liars.
Curse you all.
Their fake support was all too evident; the moment Singapore conceded a goal.
“oh that’s it lah. Singapore gonna lose, as usual. So bad lah the team”

so quick to turn on the team.
So pessimistic.
So faithless.
The fickle behavior of these fans is easily observable, and greatly sickening.

Well, the only positive was that the national stadium was filled up.
What a beautiful place with so many memories.
Cheers old lady.
Thanks for the memories.



And to the Singapore team.
Congrats on wining the tournament.
Salutations to the real fans, who were behind the team all the way and believed in them 100%.
That’s what makes football beautiful.
The players, and the fans who believe in them.


On another note, a very good friend of mine passed away in a tragic manner.
Until now, I cant believe he’s gone.
I still expect to see him in the canteen, or winking at me in the lecture theatre.
Seng, wherever you are, may you be happy.

In terms of movies, we watched the last king of Scotland.
It was an excellent movie, with forest Whitaker doing an amazing impersonation of Idi Amin. Go watch it if you can.
I watched half-nelson a couple of months back.
If whitaker does not win, ryan gosling should get the award.
He was excellent as a drug-addicted high school teacher.
Brilliant stuff.

Lookin forward to the good vibrations festival this month.
Got my early bird tickets a long time back.
Beastie boys and jurassic5.
Hell yes.

done for now.
Gotta get some work done.

Thank you gf for being the way you are.
and always making sure im doing good.
Thanks a lot,youre perfect.

And to all the rest who matter.
Much love.

im out.